During a virtual keynote with Northbridge Financial Corporation, someone asked a really insightful question:
“What’s the difference between being transparent and oversharing?”
It’s a powerful question because so many leaders blur that line.
Check out my explanation in this TikTok video:
Transparency builds alignment. It says, “Here’s what’s happening, why it matters, and what we’re doing about it.” It’s clarity that keeps people from second-guessing.
Oversharing, on the other hand, is emotional offloading. It gives people more than they need, more than they asked for, and often more than they earned the right to carry. It can feel like vulnerability—but without boundaries.
When leaders overshare, it’s usually about their need for validation or empathy, not the group’s need for clarity.
I’ve seen both sides of it. I’ve seen transparency pull teams closer—and oversharing make rooms go silent. One builds trust. The other leaks it. And if I’m being honest, I’ve done both at times. The goal is to be aware of when you’re starting to overshare and make a different choice.
TRUST TAKEAWAY
Transparency builds trust. Oversharing burdens it.
Transparency takes people with you. Oversharing asks them to carry you. The first creates psychological safety; the second creates emotional confusion. Leaders earn credibility when they share truth wrapped in tact and anchored in purpose.
YOUR TRUST CHALLENGE
Practice transparent truth-telling this week.
Before sharing something, pause and ask:
- Who is this for—me or them?
- Does this give clarity or cause confusion?
- Have they earned the right to hear it?
Use your words to bring people closer, not make them carry your chaos. That’s how you lead with tact and build trust that lasts.
WATCH JUSTIN: KEYNOTE SPEAKER ON TRUST
Justin Patton is a trust keynote speaker, leadership coach, and founder of The Trust Architect Group. Through his trademark motto Trust Starts Here™, Justin helps leaders build trust in themselves, with others, and across their culture — so they keep people coming back for more. Learn more at www.justinpatton.com.
